They dont know anything.
You dont learn things from books.
You learn things from hanging out of a helicopter blowing up a small army.
Thats real life experience.
attempt to make it relevant to the situation.
If you have just killed a crocodile, tell its corpse Youre luggage.
It doesnt matter if they are completely out of context.
Or a naked time-traveling robot.
Like, really, really really, really serious.
Not a chance, just keep your head down and your moxie up.
Get too frivolous and your friends could get killed by Mr T or a big Russian dude.
Just go home and eat pizza morosely with a pair of scissors.
Steven Seagal
Steven Seagal wants us to know that protecting the environment is really important.
Basically, hes a real life Captain Planet.
Chuck Norris
The main thing we learn from Chick Norris movies is USA!
His films dont quite preach that level of madness, but they do teach us that AMERICA is AWESOME.
The real message of Chuck Norris film though, it that white Americans are the best at martial arts.
Jean-Claude Van Damme
Are you lonely?
Does your family not understand you?
Do you feel like theres a part of you thats always been missing?
Well dont worry, because you almost definitely have a long-lost identical twin.
Maybe hes a recently deceased member of the Russian mafia and youre going to have to avenge his death.
Maybe youre actually a clone of a notorious serial killer created to help bring him to justice.
Dolph Lundgren
Swedish accents are exactly the same as Russian accents.
What have you learned from action movies?
