Jadeite, Nephrite, and Zoisite find his unmasked face familiar, but Kunzite denies any such recognition.
A warning: I will be dropping more than a few F-bombs in this review so consider yourself notified.
Point blank: I was not a fan.
I understand that was the point.
Its also the problem.
Dramatically, it just goes against everything that makes sense and satisfies.
Its an episode with a dramatic structure that is essentially backwards.
The first half of the episode is where everything really happens.
Sailor Moon is revealed to be Princess Serenity while Minako is revealed to actually be Sailor Venus.
Thats really the main event.
Everything that follows is more or less fallout from this major revelation and very little of it meaty.
It mostly consists of a lot of meaningful glances and choked up sobbing.
And again, on the page, this works pretty well, but on the screen?
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Now, Im all for experimenting with format, style, and structure.
You get some of the best episodes of television that way.
Look atBuffysRestless orBattlestarsLay Down Your Burdens, Part 2.
The first is a complete experiment in style and tone.
These experiments in episodic storytelling can be done, but its a delicate operation.
Its not so much about what the writers did as it is about how and when they did it.
See Minako/Sailor V and its corresponding manga chapter got it right.
That was precisely the way to do it, and it elevated the episode beyond its source material.
That was not what happened here, and the worst part is… it could have been.
Quite simply, not much happens.
Not much of substance, anyway.
While visually lovely, there is so much lingering on repetitive glamour shots.
It just eats up time that can be better spent on, you know, the plot.
Theres something to be said for cultivating a certain aesthetic and visual style.
Its an episode of a supernatural action-adventure series.
You dont want a lot of filler in your series, and I applaud that.
I better come out of a 22-minute episode saying, That was only 22 minutes?!
and not feeling like I paid a premium for a buffet thats all Jell-O and potato chips.
I want to feel like I just gorged myself at Thanksgiving.
I want a banquet.
That is not what this episode (and more to the point, this show) is.
And that isCrystalsmain problem.
The narrative priorities are completely reversed.
Its like when someone cuts you off halfway down the block just to beat you to a red light.
Whats the big fucking rush if youre not actually going anywhere?
Plenty of people will nail me for this criticism, saying Jesus, Michael!
All you ask for is character development, and now heres a whole episode of it!
And to that, I say… eh, kinda but not really.
Its the same thing each time.
But what does that mean for her now?
How have these revelations impacted her?
From what I can see, all thats changed is that shes gained a tendency to pass out.
And in spite of all of that, she pulls it together to kick Kunzites ass.
Now, that is a satisfying meal.
Thats at least some kind of development, but there wasnt enough process to earn that result.
Its just an on/off switch taking a character from one state of mind to another instantaneously.
One minute, Usagi is traumatized, practically in a fugue state.
The next, shes then passionately motivated toward a new goal.
Same thing with the love story.
And thats just my beef with their present life romance.
We dont actually see them falling in love.
Serenity stalks Endymion for five seconds, and then weretoldtheyre in love.
And while this sequence is exquisitely designed and animated, its pretty hollow.
To be fair, this is not a complaint exclusive to the manga andCrystal.
Its an issue Ive had with this past life romance in every iteration of the story.
It has no substance.
Its basically two pretty young people whom were supposed to just accept are in love.
But theyre in love because the author says so.
However, a simple, adolescentamour fouis not what were being sold.
This isnt the only questionable distribution of time and focus.
An entire sequence is spent on Luna having a huge pity party of her own.
What exactly is she so ashamed of?
Did she not accomplish her mission?
She found Usagi, saw to it that she became Sailor Moon, and trained her.
And bonus, she found three other Sailor Guardians as well.
How exactly did she fail?
She says she should have trusted Usagi more, but trusted her to do what?
How the hell was Luna supposed to know that?
What is that shit?
InCrystal, all of them are alive and only Kunzite denies any recognition of Endymion.
Whats more, the scene where the four of them confronted, Endymion in the past was completely cut.
We are lingering in empty calorie moments.
Same with the Sailor Guardians.
During the scene in Usagis room, the girls are repeating what Artemis literally just told them seconds ago.
You know, I love me some talking heads.
Im a Sorkin fan for gods sakes.
Well, you know what?
Its a stupid trope.
Yes, I like information to be reinforced within the text, but not several times in a row.
And like, really?
The Sailor Guardians survived that whole battle, heard Usagi screaming Endymiooooon!
So… Ben is Glory?
What the fuck, writers?!
They are practically devoid of personality.
Ami, Rei, Makoto, and Minako have, at this point, become completely interchangeable.
The point is that it was an exchange that no one but Rei could have had with Usagi.
Makoto would have sympathized with Usagis heartbreak and used strong, encouraging sentiments.
Luna would have pleaded, and Artemis would have been a dick.
Every single character in that scenario would have approached the situation in their own unique way.
That is lazy, writers.
Now, this basic story was handled quite differently in the manga (and thus,Crystal) andClassic.
They werent going to be identical, and no ones saying they should have been.
Take Zoisite, for instance.
In the manga, hes already dead.
InCrystal, hes still alive but hasnt taken the actions to warrant his execution at Beryls hands.
Either way, his death would not be a plot point in this episode.
And thats perfectly fine.
But make the most of the content you have.
This episode didnt do that.
Which, incidentally, provides us with a proper climax in Act 3 of the story.
But really, this episode itself didnt bother me so much as what it represents.
Because, yes, Id seen the charms included with the Japanese DVDs, but thats just merch.
What the fuck do you mean, you couldnt?!
You decide what the story is!
Its completely up to you!
As you’re free to see, I got quite upset.
Because as flawed asClassicwas and holy crap, it was!
the manga was far from perfect.
It is not the superior version just by virtue of coming first.
Frankly, if all theyre doing is animating the manga, I dont see the point.
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Rating:
2.5 out of 5
