Tis the season to be pensive, as the old carol says.

Focusing specifically on cinema, its time to think on the Film Year 2014 and make some lists.

Someone called Sten hey, Sten!

Theres more to come I guess…

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Sten guessed right, because more supreme supplementary characters came along.

(Theyve read the Bible.

They know how this works.)

In fact, hes the character who most resembles a real human being in this essentially ludicrous series.

The scene where he takes out half the Boston Irish mob without even creasing his silk tie is spectacular.

Hes exactly the sort of meticulous well-dressed sociopath I always wanted to be when I grew up.

Teddy is also an antagonist who makes for an ideal prequel spin-off subject.

Private detective Matthew Scudder is played by Liam Neeson.

The big man could do with some help and maybe even a buddy.

Enter homeless minor TJ to lend a pair of undersized hands and some youthful perspective.

But what about now, though?

We like TJ, and reckon that hes got a bright (blockbuster franchise) future.

Ruskin: Man of Feels leading up to an MCU-style Victorian artist shared universe, anyone?

I got really excited aboutDracula Untoldwhen I read that Charles Dance was playing Caligula.

For all those people who wonder how do they sleep at night?

Oh, and Tyler Perry is throwing Haribo at people again.

This is a sickeningly sweet proposition.

is usually very comfortably, on an extra-sized bed with a very attractive sexual partner massaging their ear lobes.

Sometimes its actually tranquilisers and enough medication to put a Kaiju monster into a coma.

Ah, thisd be a right laugh, it would.

Theyre also a very funny crowd, which is all the more outstanding given the circumstances.

Everybody had such a nice time with those ladies that itd be sad not to see them again.

How about a movie where the Ladies of Onllwyn go on a package holiday to Sharm el-Sheikh?

(This sounds better thanThe Expendables 3and, in fact,The ExpendaBelles).

Mrs. Headon goes to Washington!

Ah, thats bang tidy!

Switch TARS humour setting to 100% and commission this now womankinds next step will be our greatest.

James Clayton is all ready to star in his own R-rated spin-off from The Expendables series.

You canread Jamess previous column here.