This is his story.
Sometimes, the bad is just as enjoyable as the good.
That said, bad wrestling stuff is even more surreal when you string a bunch of it together.
For people who love poking fun at the dumber side of wrestling, May 19 is practically a holiday.
It revolves around Kane, which shouldnt be a big surprise, since hes a magnet for ridiculous storylines.
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The storys true starting point begins as far back as the fall of 2005.
They debuted it a year earlier and it was a pretty fun show.
John Cena was WWE Champion and was feuding with Kurt Angle.
Three qualifying matches onRawwould bring in three potential challengers.
The last of which was a battle royal featuring the surprise return of Kane.
Yes, Val Venis was still around in late 2005.
Im just as surprised as you are.
We ended up with Kane, Big Show, and Shawn Michaels.
The fans would vote on which one would be added into Cena vs.
Angle atTaboo Tuesday, making it a Triple Threat.
The other two would become partners against the tag champs Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch.
All well and good, but WWE hedged thehellout of their bets.
Second, Michaels got his own one-on-one match with Cena in the lead-up.
Third, Big Show and Kane were forced to be tag partners a couple of times.
Big Show and Kane proceeded to steamroll through Cade and Murdoch, becoming World Tag Team Champions.
Their run was one of if not THE most dominant tag title runs in WWE history.
For the most part, their defenses werent even on PPV because they were so one-sided.
They did have a non-title match atArmageddonagainst WWE Tag Team Champions Batista and Rey Mysterio fromSmackDown.
Kane cleanly pinned Mysterio in that instance.
The tag belts stopped being their focus for a bit.
Big Show split for a little while to feud with Triple H while Kane challenged for the WWE Championship.
And now were at the point where the story started to go off the rails.
The following week, Big Show and Kane got their rematch.
In the match against the Spirit Squad, Kane completely lost his shit and started destroying the entire Squad.
His use of a chair got him disqualified.
Then he beat up the ref.
Big Show stepped in, but got chokeslammed for it.
So what was May 19th?
Hey, it beat the timethey dedicated aSummerSlammain event toNo Holds Barred.
and that just invited Big Show to angrily repeat May 19th!
until Kane bloodied his eye.
The match was signed forBacklash 06.
Big Show vs. Kane.
Instead, Kane threw him to the outside and things got crazy.
It was kind of embarrassing to sit through.
Kanes obsession and hatred with May 19th continued, albeit with nobody to feud with.
Samantha Noble didnt even give a shot to keep a straight face in this bit.
Kane was put in another match against with Big Show.
Jim Ross even stated that we wouldnt be seeing any kind of catch-as-catch-can grappling between the two.
But he was wrong.
That wasexactlywhat we got!
Kane and Big Showchain wrestling.
It was actually a brilliant character moment that was lost on a lot of people.
Big Show still liked Kane.
He considered Kane his friend.
He really didnt want to hurt the guy.
He just wanted his pal back.
He offered his hand to Kane early on and Kane accepted the handshake.
Rather than turn it into a violent slugfest, Big Show busted out hammerlocks and drop-toe-holds and the like.
Hed smile and do a little jig after a takedown to playfully show off his fancy footwork.
It was his way to appeal to Kane and get him to lighten up.
This time, the Titantron featured a CGI image of Kanes old mask, surrounded with fire.
Kane lost his mind and beat down Big Show with a chair.
Michaels was given the job of refereeing a match between Kane and Rob Conway.
He just had to do it while wearing a yellow shirt covered with MAY 19TH.
Conway arrived first and taunted the doomed Michaels, only to receive a punch to the balls.
Michaels then removed his shirt and forced it onto Conway, just before Kane made his entrance.
As Michaels hung back, Kane proceeded to thrash poor, t-shirt-wearing Conway for several minutes.
It was like a bigTwilight Zonetwist based on Conways theme song.
SmackDownwas on Fridays back then, meaning there was indeed a May 19th edition.
That show was in the middle of its own thread of stupidity with Rey Mysterios World Heavyweight Championship reign.
You know, like Seth Rollins booking, only as a face.
He preceded the match by tricking Mysterio into saying what day it was.
Kane appeared, beat up Mysterio, and then started to have one of his episodes.
which caused Kane to lay out JBL as well.
Essentially, Kane was Candlejack fromFreakazoid.
And so,See No Evilwas finally released.
that did not happen.
WWEs hype for the movie led to one genuinely funny moment in a backstage segment involving Gene Snitsky.
Once Kanes blood rival, Snitsky had been repackaged as an upbeat dude with a foot fetish.
Anyway, he suggested seeingSee No Evilon a date.
Very casually, he mentioned, We can go see the new movie from Kane,See No Evil.
I once killed his unborn fetus, but were over that now.
I hear its really scary.
You like Chinese food?
WWE continued to talk upSee No Evil, but the release date had come and gone.
So…now what?
Simply put, things would get even MORE batshit.
It started sanely enough with Kane coming clean with the meaning of his outbursts.
He had tried to suppress the memory, but the constant mentioning of that date set him off.
It warned him that it was not over.
It would never be over.
Or, I should say, 1997 Kane.
It was Luke Gallows dressed in an awful Party City 1997 Kane outfit.
Regardless, Imposter Kane chokeslammed his doppelganger and we had a new feud: Kane vs. his eviler double.
Their match would take place atVengeanceat the end of June.
That meant a month of Gallows-Kane terrorizing Jacobs-Kane.
Jacobs-Kane tried to pick a fight with him backstage, but was undone by Gallows-Kanes superior mind-game prowess.
Namely, the ability to flicker the lights while verrrrry slowly sneaking up behind him.
The imposter once again dominated and this time threw Jacobs-Kane off the stage and onto the concrete.
He didnt name names, but he said he knew him growing up.
He acted rather disturbed, talking about how this guy was way too sadistic.
AtVengeance, Gallows-Kane looked a hell of a lot better.
All things considered, he did a pretty damn good job copying Kane.
The match wasnt much, but Ive seen much worse.
It just didnt grab anyone and got a handful of BORING!
chants towards the end.
The match ended with Jacobs-Kane jumping off the top rope and getting caught with a chokeslam.
The imposter won and the feud was seemingly going to continue.
On the very next night, Jacobs-Kane had a match against Randy Orton.
Once again, the imposter showed up.
That was the big payoff.
The dissolution of the dominant tag team.
The confusing and violent mental episodes.
Some pieces of this storyline lived on.
The followingWrestleManiafeatured Kane vs. Great Khali and Kane busted out Jacob Goodnights chained hooks for a moment mid-match.
Surprisingly, WWE never seemed to go farther with the callbacks than that.
Eight years after the original, they made a sequel toSee No Evil.
Corporate Kane decided to make it up to him by becoming texting buddies.
God, I miss that series.
As faces and heels, they regularly teamed up over the years.
In fact, their appearance at Royal Rumble 15 is a lot like their appearance atTaboo Tuesday.
It…didnt work as well this time.
