Most Bruce Willis movies right now seem to head to DVD almost immediately.
We’ve found even more of them…
This article has been updated to include two new films Precious CargoandMarauders.
And how many have interestingly-Photoshopped front covers?
We still feel like, at the very least, Bruce Willis and sci-fi/fantasy are a good match.
The washed out visuals and quasi-clinical sets dont do anything to draw us in, unfortunately.
Our Bruce apathetic and side-smiley as ever is in trouble at the start ofExtraction.
Later, Bruce is being captured again.
Instead, we get D.B.
Have you ever been to Prague?
Theres more going on in Norwich.
It has a decent colour palette, but the script is woeful.
Theres also the casting.
Its a surreal jolt.
I would advise you to avoid it, if you’re free to.
He does, but thats not where his investigation ends.
Bruce himself is fine inThe Assassination, although a little off kilter.
It turns out the original quote was Bruce Willis is hilariously intense.
RIP, I died.
By the time you get to the end of the movie and realise youve been duped, who cares?
Theyve already taken your time and money.
Its a nice little system for everyone involved.
Story-wise, weve got ourselves anotherTakenknock-off.
Jason Patrics daughter has been taken (or has she?)
and he happens to have a very particular set of skills in his arsenal.
Im not suggesting that he was trolleyed during the shoot, but he looks absolutely trolleyed.
Suddenly, a message from the filmmakers pops up: Produced in association with PRINCE YOOHANHWESA.
That cant be it.
I must have missed something.
There must be some other reason?
Well, shes pregnant, and she says its his.
Forgiving some slightly cringeworthy acting from a few of the more minor players, its just fine.
Theres a boat chase, for example.
Hard to hate a movie with a boat chase in it.
At this point, well have our oh yeah, Bruce Willis is in this, isnt he?
I forgot moment, after which hell pop off again until the climax.
The films plot, regardless of Bruces role, is simultaneously both overly-complex and absolute twaddle.
These films seem to be falling off the end of a very efficient factory production line.
Until next time, I bid you adieu.
